


The Shivers of Color.

by Candlecanes



Category: None - Fandom, The Shivers of Color, This is a book
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Agender, Bisexual, Book - Freeform, Depression, Ex, F/F, F/M, Friendship, Gay, Homophobia, I'm watching a danisnotonfire video and no really paying attention so sorry, M/M, Other, Sadness, Shipping, Weird teachers, if these are shit, lgbtq+
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-06
Updated: 2017-02-08
Packaged: 2018-09-22 13:14:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,449
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9609005
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Candlecanes/pseuds/Candlecanes
Summary: This is a book I am writing and I am sorry if it is shit.





	1. Prologue

Cory Vessels had a hard life, it's getting better, but sometimes the past can attack his head at random moments, leaving him depressed for days on end. Sure, his parents were still married, he had his fair share of friends, and he had his passions. But everything seemed almost faded. Nothing seemed to last forever, he knew this, but he tried, he tried so hard to make things last as long as he could.

Cory had suffered from depression, but he didn't know it was happening, when he was in third grade he started to be bullied, but him being the little ray of sunshine he was, he didn't know it until he was older, around eleven. Cory noticed all of his story of sad things happened in third or fourth grade. Cory was physically bullied for the first, and last time in third grade, or it could have been fourth, honestly, he had tried so hard to forget, but he just couldn't. He forgot bits and pieces, but he will always remember the main portion of it.

How he was in the big van coming back from a field trip, he sat next to these two or three boys which apparently knew his sister. Cory sat in the very corner by the window, with a boy on a angle from him, that boy, who he can't remember his name, or his face or anything about him, even though he had left a permanent scar, that no one could see. The boy without a name and a face to him, started to name different types of punches, (Which Cory figured out the boy was lying about them) and started to hit Cory in the arm relatively. They were hard enough to leave bruises, and that scar in his mind, Cory cried while being hit, in the darkness of the van, no one could see his tears, he tried his hardest to keep quiet, and those boy that knew his sister, were all laughing and muttering things under their breathes.

It was his best and only friends birthday. He had forgot, but when his Mother came to pick him up, she had reminded him. That was the only time he can remember crying about something so crushing in front of his mom. Not because he was trying to stay manly or anything, he never cared what people thought him. But when Cory was being punched, the boy was going to hit him again, but Cory turned his head, and kicked the boy in the wrist as hard his could. He had broken the boys wrist, he knew because he was in the hallway for school the following Monday and seen the boy in a cast.

But that hadn't affected him that much. Well compared to when his grandpa had died from a heart attack. Ever since then,

Cory was broken.

He remembered when he got a slip from the office to go home with his cousins, which he never did, but Cory was never on to question much, well he did once this happened. Cory was a happy kid, until that evening had made everything fade, no, not all at once, it took about a month for it to actual make it's way into his mind. When Cory, his sister, and his two cousins walked into the house, to see their mom crying on the couch. Cory hates his cousins and their mom, so seeing her cry wasn't the worst thing. She was the one to tell them that his grandpa had died.

His life went spiraling into a mess of black and white. Then at the very end of the year, Cory had finally started to meet people and his world started to fade back into color, but everything was still pretty much black and white in his mind. Well, that was until his parents moved the family to a new town when he was going into 5th grade, the town was small, but it was still okay, Cory remembers when his mom took him and his sister to see a house a couple hours away. They bought it.

It was the beginning of November, the 5th if Cory remembers right. He still didn't have friends, sure he had two people that he sat by and talked to at lunch, but besides that, he didn't have anyone. Cory walked over to the swings, and seen a boy, with brown eyes and brown hair, he was staring at the ground. He was dressed a little off but, it was the only swing open. The boy, which he later found out was Luke Anderson. That boy turns out to be his best friend for years, and he makes it last, and so far they haven't ended.


	2. The Shivers of Colors on Sunday mornings.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More characters are here! Also less sadness.

Sometimes everything felt almost warm, the colors were always warm, nice, and well, pleasing. But other times it felt as if the world had faded and everything was dull, it wasn't quiet black and white, but it was close. Days would vary, some days my red bed sheets were very vibrant, but other days it felt like it was a dull and dusty red. Red is one of the best colors in my opinion, along with black and white. I don't like saying I have a favorite color, or a favorite anything for that matter. It makes me feel like I am the head of some game for gym class and I had to pick someone to fit my team and I don't know what game we are playing, but everyone is good at different things. One person, lets say yellow, is good at basketball, while another person, lets say green, is good at football and basketball, but another person, red for instance, is good at football, hockey and baseball, but is bad at basketball.

They are all good at things, some are almost the same whist others are completely different. Today was one of my favorites, I woke up and everything was warm. Varying shades of light yellows, browns, light blues, pastel pinks, and white, I wasn't feeling gross as I normally do when I wake up, this time it felt nice. It was a nice Sunday morning, and everything felt nice. Right seems like a better word, yes, everything felt right, for now anyways.

Sunday's are always the best. My sister is working, my parents are off doing whatever they do every Sunday, so the house is left to myself. I slowly rose from the warmth and softness of my covers, and rubbed my hazel eyes, I looked out the window to see Tux, a very original name I had given to my tuxedo cat when I was around eight. I smiled at her as she meowed, every morning was the same, and I liked it, simply things are always nice, but they aren't the best for me.

My mornings would normally be, waking up early, seeing to see if my world would be faded or warm or whatever it was feeling that day. Then slowly getting out of bed to see Tux on the window still, making eye contact, and then meowing. In my mind it was her way of telling me good morning, but she is just probably happy to see I'm not dead sense I am the only one who really feeds her. I would finally walk out of bed and change into clothes, I always hate when people say to me when they see me in the morning 'Where are you going?'. Just because I got dressed doesn't mean I'm going anywhere, I just feel more at home, or cozy, in clothes rather than pajamas. I don't really eat breakfast, I know I know, I should, I guess am not hungry in the mornings I suppose. That's my normal morning.

But when the colors are warm, I normally eat breakfast and do things I don't normally do. I like seeing the warmth, and seeing all the colors. It feels as if the colors of the world shiver, they shift and change from different forms and shades. They affect so much on how I will act, the way I will feel, and the things I will do. That's unless I have something I need to get done.

Tux walked through the opened window off the still and onto my desk, which is in front of my window. I don't understand why the window still is her favorite spot in the world. It has chipped white and gray paint, it is rotting in some spots, and the edges are breaking off. But who am I to question my cat's thoughts and emotions towards a window still.

I stroked her back, making her purr. Tux isn't a old cat, when we got her she was just a kitten, and I'm glad we got her when we did, because if we didn't then she would have been put down.

I rolled myself out of safe and warmth of my bedding, and my feet hit the wooden floor. I grabbed out some clothes, just a pair of grayish white skinny jeans, and a t-shirt that is auburn with a pocket on it. I walked out of my room into the hallway to see that no one is home, I smiled. I love it when no one is home, it makes me sound like a stereotypical teenage boy, but it's different. I don't have friends to party with, and even if I did I won't, I am what you call introverted. I strolled my way to the kitchen and grabbed a bowl and some random cereal that is probably covered in sugar, and some milk.

Tux made her way to the kitchen, and rubbed against my calf begging for affection. I shook my head and smiled, another reason why I love Sunday's so much. For some strange reason Tux is always very, how to I phrase it, needy? Clingy? Affectionate? I'm not sure, something along those lines, but she is never like this to anyone else but me and Luke, and its mainly on Sunday morning. She must like Sunday mornings too. I put my bowl onto the wooden table, and sat down and started to eat, I was only a few bites in when I heard-or felt-my phone vibrate in my pocket.

I grabbed my phone out of my pocket, setting my spoon down into the bowl of cereal, it is a Iphone in the color gold, but no one can really tell due to my jet black phone case, with trees and some song lyrics on it. When I looked down at my phone the brightness was still turned all the way down from when I was awake at 2 am and on Tumblr, I quickly turned my brightness up to see a text from a guy named Cole. My heart sped up a bit and I got a little shaky, I liked Cole for probably almost a year. It was just him commenting on a art piece I did of Ollie, one of my original characters that I draw a lot. It was just him saying 'Nice Job' and I replied 'Thanks' well, I think I did. It might not have sent, oh well.

Cole and I have a not so long history but a weird one may I add. It started back last school year when I joked 'What's the odds of us sitting next to each other?' We did and then everything got really confusingly weird and stupid. Long story short, I had asked him out over text message and he never answered me, I'm not giving every detail, but when I first confessed to liking him, he had a boyfriend and broke up with them about a week later. It was the end of the school year on the last day of school, one of my toxic friends, which I'm happy to say is not longer my friend, asked Cole out for me, and he said he would text me that night, I guess he was just avoiding rejecting me, but I would have much rather have been rejected then avoided.

I guess you could say that Cole and I are friends, but I don't know. I mean we barely know each other, not that he really cares.

Cole and I wouldn't be the greatest couple either, even though two of my friends have broken the stereotype that popular guys have to date popular girls. Her name is Allie and her boyfriend is one of the guys on the football team and isn't actually that bad, Allie is pretty much the 'emo' or 'goth' stereotype, and her boyfriend, Gabe, is pretty much the stupid (Even though he is actually pretty smart) jock stereotype.

I on the other hand, am pretty much the leader of the outcasts. What I mean by that is that, I know everyone, and everyone knows me, but we are not friends, I only really have two people that I consider my best friends, Luke Anderson and Erika Roberts. But I do have some people that I would consider my 'friends' per say, Allie being one of them along with Tyler, he is very shy, he is a complete sweetheart but hangs out with the wrong people and his mom has breast cancer, and his family is really close and protective (and also extremely religious may I add). Then there is Caleb, he's a interesting one, he doesn't really have a friend group, he has a massive amount of friends and is pretty weird. Caleb is the one who really catches me up with anything that happens (Gossip really).

Tate, he was a part of my group for a year or so, but then later left for the semi-popular guys. We still talk some of the time, and Lyle, he is a friend of Tate's that is okay? I mean we don't really talk but we get along and used to be good friends and he used to be in my group for probably around a month.

There is also Jack, he is a little emo punk thats is actually older than me, but he gives the best hugs I have ever had, and Erika wants me and him to date. But Jack and I said, yeah sure, we would possibly date, but we probably shouldn't because we are both pretty much assholes and tell each other to fuck off all the time, but we are close, so we can say that and its not mean. I could add Cole to the list of people, but he is a weird one when it comes to stereotypes. I know stereotypes can't mean much, we all have a stereotype that we fit into, but it's..strange when it comes to him.

Cole used to be one of the losers. I'm not trying to sound rude or anything but he used to actually be a loser, then over two summers ago something changed and he was fused into the popular group. Cole is still a part of the popular group and only hangs out with them, but he keeps trying to hang out with Luke and I. Cole also is turning into a emo, even though he just has the hair, but I guess it's kind of cute looking. It's way better than a buzz cut in my opinion.

Last year Cole had a lot of girls and guys under is spell, what I mean is that if you asked everyone who their crush was, 5 out of 10 people would probably say Cole. Probably 2 out of 10 would say Luke and 3 out of 10 would say me, and I'm not trying to say that I'm amazing or anything, I actually cringe at the idea of someone liking me, even in the slightest.

This got me thinking about how my school is a semi-stereotypical high school. There is the class clown, Erik, he used to be extremely annoying and offense, but he changed over the summer, were now, sure he gets a lot of in school suspensions, but he isn't, the only way I can phrase it is not a dick or an asshole anymore.

The popular girls leader, her name is Emma, she is a bitch. That is all I'm going to say about her.


	3. A New Shoulder to Cry on

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You meet Luke, Cole and Scott. Also hear of a teacher.

It was now the first Monday of the school year and I was waiting quietly with my headphones in, listening a band that probably a couple thousand people have heard of in the whole wide god-damned world. I was waiting for the bus to come. Even though I would much rather have be driven, but I couldn't today, and my sister took my car, which used to be my Fathers, but now Charlie and I have to share it. 

When the bus had finally pulled in front of my driveway it was probably five or so minutes, but there is always that little thought that maybe I had missed the bus that day and that I would have to walk and be super late, or not even go at all or call my Dad and have him pick me up and drop me off at school, but all my anxieties had calmed once I seen the rusted sun faded bus pull in forward. 

I made my way into the bus once the doors had squeaked open. I was met with Joyce, the bus driver for bus 17. She is a smoker and has been married more times than I've been in summer school. Lets just say I've been in summer school about four times. She gave me a sweet smile and I smiled back because I'm not a asshole. Once I had seen everyone on the bus, which wasn't hard due to the fact that I'm the third person to be picked up, but my eyes landed on Jack Fauna. A junior, which just happens to be one of my friends, which I know from the band program, and the drama program that I forced Luke to join with me and we are literal some of the most well known people in the program.

I made my way over to Jack, he looked over to me due to the fact the he was staring out the window with his eyes closed. Jack is a another emo-ish kid, he has the hair, which is a dark brown or black, I personally can't tell. He is wearing a pair of black jeans as am I, and a Crown the Empire shirt. Most people think Jack and I are dating even though we aren't, but the thing is, I would date Jack, but I don't like him really. 

"Hey." Jack said in a very sleepy voice. I did the 'I want to laugh but it seem inappropriate'

"Hey, did you get any sleep at all last night?" I asked him. Jack shut his eyes for about 20 some seconds and made a groaning sound.

"Not really..." 

"I mean sure it's the first real school week but still. Jack come on man." By now I have sat down and took my phone out along with my headphones.

"Shut up, you don't have a younger brother. He kept me awake all night." Jack rested his head against the window and probably fell asleep.

Once we had reached the school, the bus was full of hot breathe and many voices fulling the air, people piled up and flooded on the buses making their way to the seats where they normally sat. The conversation Jack was having with another student was drowned up by my music and I dazed off thinking about whatever I could to get my mind off the fact that Scott shares half of my classes. 

 

Once they had reached the school yard, the sun rusted school buses pulled into the parking spots. The students flooded off and walked to the school. Jack should walked in a different direction due to the fact that his locker is the junior hallway, even though we walked through the sophomore hall together. That’s when I seen Luke talking with two girls, who I believe are freshmen, all I really seen was him point at the closest trash-can and I seen him say ‘me’, and the two freshmen start laughing and Luke look strangely unsettled as always. The first bell rang and the freshmen walk away. I remember when I cared about being to class on time, that was before Scott came in and fucked up, well, everything.

I walked over to Luke, “Who were those nerds? Freshman?” Luke laughed slightly even though he says ‘I have the worst laugh.’ It has become something that calms me down over the years.

“Yeah. I got bored. I had thought and they happened to be the ones to hear it.” Luke stated, I started to get semi-curious.

“Okay. What thought?” I asked, at this point I rarely question him anymore.

“Okay so this sounds weird, but like, if a fish ate another fish would it get smarter from the fish oil-woah they are hot.” Luke said looking over my shoulder. I turned over and seen someone of a shorter height, long pixie haircut, that is slightly curled. Wearing a pair of gray overalls with a lime green tee under and a pair of black boots, with a carnation in the pocket. I shrugged slightly, semi-agreeing.

“Psh whatever go be a gay child somewhere else.” I hit Lukes arm laughing and he groaned at me hitting his arm. “Ow. Well, I’m going to go to class. Are you coming or are you going to be edgy and be late?” I shrugged for what felt like the third time this morning.

“Maybe. I still gotta go to my locker and get my shit. But wait for me dude.” 

I walked to my locker and was almost to my first hour when the second bell rang. “Shit..” I mumbled under my breath. I walked into the office, and I noticed that Mr. Slivers, the man who works the front desk wasn’t there, but there was a familiar figure was standing by the desk instead. He must have heard the door shut or open and turned. Fuck, fuck, fuck. It was Scott. He slightly smirked and crossed his arms.

“Hey I seen your stupid-ass sister working, did you get my message?” Once I first heard his voice that has also sounded what I think milk would sound like, I haven’t heard in the longest time, ever since he broke up with me on the date that I thought was perfect. He continued to slightly smirk as that is the way he smiles. The way he smiled when he first asked me to be his boyfriend. The way he smiled when he took me on dates, the way he smiled when he asked for me to come out to my sister and my friends. His lips the color of a pale pink cotton candy sucker that you would get as a kid when you went to the bank with your parents, the way those pink cotton candy sucker lips formed around the words ‘I love you’ and ‘I love you too.’. The memories of his life mashing with mine came back like a flood. 

“Yea.” Was all I could muster up, I never tried to think about him, he just kind of popped up once and awhile, it would hurt me for around a week or maybe more or less depending on the memory or if Luke or Charlie could get him off my mind. Sometimes thinking about him felt as if someone took a ice pick and shoved it below my heart, not my heart but below, he never truly had a place in my heart. He moved, making his way slowly over to me, in the same way he always used to,. I couldn’t move, if I could I would punch him, push him away, anything but just stand there and hurt. I felt a familiar feeling on my shoulder, a far too familiar feeling. It was his hand resting on my shoulder. “No.” I whispered, with a shaky voice.

“I’m sorry, I couldn’t hear you over your tears, speak up and maybe you shouldn't be mumbling, I thought we went over this before, babe” His voice slowly turned into a whisper, leaning his face closer to mine, but I truly didn’t know I was crying. I couldn’t feel, I felt as if he turned me to stone, I can’t move, I couldn’t feel the tears that are apparently flowing down my face, I don’t even know if I have a pulse anymore. This isn’t normal, is it? Before I could think anymore. His slowly pushed his pale pink cotton candy suck lips onto mine, and when I felt the hot tears, slowly streaking down my face. He put his hand on my upper arm and tried pulling me into the kiss, I was still froze and even if I wasn’t I wouldn't kiss him even if my life depended on it. That’s when a noise that was far too familiar came from behind me, I could see in the reflection of the glass. Cole. Scott pulled away, not letting go of my upper arm however.

“Cole.” Scott said in a patronising voice, but he was smiling while he said it, even though he was still making dead eye contact with me, my heart was in my stomach making eye contact with him, it was the worst thing because him making eye contact is something he only really ever did with me. Scotts hand raked down my arm and somewhat held my hand, I felt like both throwing up and crying, even though I already doing one of the two, crying. Scott walked past me and lightly rammed his shoulder into mine, I winced, no, not because it hurt, but because he touched me again. He walked past Cole and patted his back and walked out , hearing the door close again I released a deep and long sigh. I walked back to the chairs that were lined up by the window in the office. Cole looked at me with great sorrow, being friends with Scott, he knows how hard it is to get rid of him. 

“..um. Where’s Mr.Slivers?” Cole asked, knowing me, he knew not to ask because it would make me break down even worse. I didn’t answer not knowing nor caring at this point. We stood in silence that was so tense you could cut it with a knife when Mr.Slivers walked out of the Principal's office, flustered. He banged his fist on the wall once he seen Cole.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading~

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not going to try to hard to keep updating this, but I will try none the less.


End file.
